DISCLAIMER - Not mine, I couldn't afford the motor and household insurance bills. I promise I'll scrub them down and give them back to DC comics, the WB and anyone else who does own a slice of them when I'm done with them. Story, such as it is, copyright Karen Colohan, September 2003.

Author's notes - Betaed by the ever lovely Barbara. This story is part of the Cliche fuh-q-fest at: http://www.kardasi.com/Cliched/index.htm



Clark Kent was heavy. There was no escaping the fact; especially when he was drunk enough to be practically incapable of supporting his own weight. As he was right now.

Chloe had never seen Clark really drunk before. Pete had managed to get him mildly tipsy once or twice back in Smallville, but Clark didn't seem to make a habit out of drinking, under normal circumstances.

For some reason Clark had abandoned his usual scruples at the party tonight, downing beer after beer. When Chloe had asked him why, he'd simply shrugged his shoulders. Then he'd taken another long drink before mumbling something about it being the sort of thing normal students did, so why shouldn't he.

Based on her long friendship with Clark, normal wasn't the first word that sprang to Chloe's mind to describe him. And if this was the result, she hoped this attempt at normalcy would be short lived. Chloe didn't think that she'd survive the experience of trying to steer a seriously inebriated Clark back to his dorm room on a regular basis.

On the plus side, a drunken Clark was turning out to be an unusually chatty Clark. He was currently regaling Chloe with his opinions of a certain bald billionaire of their mutual acquaintance. She was somewhat surprised, though, when Clark's enthusiastic ramblings suddenly took a different turn.

"Don't you think Lex should wear tighter pants?" Clark asked dreamily as Chloe pointed him up the stairs that led to his room.

"What?" Her eyes widened at the apparent non sequitur.

"You must have noticed, Chloe," Clark slurred. "Lex has a great ass and it would look really good in tight pants."

Chloe was immensely grateful for the fact that Clark's room was only just down the corridor. The conversation had definitely just taken a turn towards the weird.

"When did you start taking notice of Lex's ass?" she asked, curious nonetheless.

Clark licked his lips. "I used to love watching him bend over the table when we played pool together. We played pool a lot." Clark giggled. "I used to call him Sexy Lexy."

Chloe's mouth dropped open. "You didn't!"

"Oh, not to his face." Clark's expression turned mournful. "Just in my dreams."

Clark Kent had dreams about Lex Luthor. The kind in which the use of the name Sexy Lexy was appropriate. That was definitely veering in the direction of TMI, Chloe decided as she propped Clark against the wall while she fished in his jacket pocket for his room key. She found it and hurriedly pushed Clark inside, flicking the light switch before closing the door behind them.

"I think you should get some sleep, Clark," she said firmly, guiding him across to his bed.

He flopped down onto it, sprawling back bonelessly.

"Did you know that Lex rhymes with sex?" Clark said, peering up at her from under his lashes. "Lex, sex. Sex, Lex. See?" He paused for a second before adding, "Why do you think Lex would never have sex with me, Chloe?"

Chloe made a strangled sound. This was certainly not a conversation she'd anticipated having with Clark. After all his years of Lana fixation a secret crush on Lex was the last thing she would have expected him to admit to. God, it was just as well Clark had never got this drunk before, Chloe thought with relief.

The fact that she hadn't answered his previous question didn't seem to deter Clark.

"D'you think Lex likes me?" he asked, his green eyes wide and somewhat unfocused as he stared up at the ceiling.

"Of course he likes you, you've been friends for years," Chloe assured him.

"No." Clark frowned. "D'you think he likes me, likes me?"

Ah, they'd returned to this again. Chloe considered the question. Thinking back, she realised it was perfectly possible to interpret a lot of Lex's behaviour towards Clark as subtle flirting, especially in the early days of their friendship. Mentally readjusting her picture of Lex and his intentions, Chloe had to admit that it led to some interesting possibilities.

"You know what, Clark," Chloe said finally. "I'm not sure I'm the best person to ask about that, but I know someone who would be. Why don't you just wait there while I go and find out."

Clark curled more comfortably on his bed, smiling drunkenly at her. "Thanks, Chloe, you're a good friend. The best."

Despite the fact that she'd got over her crush on Clark a long time ago, Chloe found herself swallowing a lump in her throat. She dug into Clark's jacket pocket again, coming up with his cellphone. She knew he had Lex on speed dial. It was the second number, right after Clark's parents. Turning away from the sight of Clark, all mussed hair and wide eyes, Chloe hit the button to call Lex.

It was answered on only the second ring. Lex sounded wide awake and more than a little concerned. "Clark? Is something wrong? Why are you calling so late?"

"Hi, Lex, it isn't Clark," Chloe began.

"Chloe?" Lex interrupted before she could get any further. "Why are you calling? Has something happened to Clark?"

The anxiety in Lex's voice over that possibility pretty much answered the whole liking issue, Chloe decided.

"Not exactly," she replied with a sigh. Behind her, Clark chose that moment to reprise his earlier refrain.

"Lex, sex! Sex, Lex!" he sing-songed happily as Chloe held the phone out in his direction for a moment.

"That's what happened," she said when she brought the cellphone back to her ear.

"Is Clark drunk?" Lex sounded shocked.

"Just a bit..." Clark's singing continued in the background, punctuated by soft giggles. "Lex, I really think you and Clark need to have a little talk. Can you come over?"

There was the briefest of pauses, then, "I'll be there in five minutes."

The line went dead before Chloe had the chance to say anything else.

Glancing over her shoulder, Chloe whispered, "I think that means he likes you, Clark. I really do."

Lex was as good as his word, knocking on the door of Clark's room barely five minutes later. Chloe wondered just how many traffic violations he'd notched up to manage it. She was glad that he'd arrived, though, because Clark seemed to be getting restless.

He'd dragged himself off the bed a couple of minutes earlier and was now stumbling around the room a little uncertainly. Every so often he'd stop and remove a piece of clothing, tossing it carelessly onto the floor. So far Clark had taken off his jacket, his shoes and socks and his blue flannel shirt. Chloe was starting to get a little worried about just how far he intended to take this striptease.

Lex immediately looked past Chloe towards Clark when she let him in. She saw his eyes widen as Clark grabbed the hem of his T-shirt, pulling it up over his head. As the move revealed Clark's bare, tanned chest she couldn't really blame him.

Clark seemed to get tangled up in the white material for a second, his muscles flexing as he struggled with it. Then his head popped free and Clark dropped the shirt onto the floor with the rest of his discarded clothes.

With an obvious effort, Lex dragged his attention back to Chloe.

"Thank you for calling me," he said quickly. "I think I can handle this from here."

Chloe eyed him speculatively. "Did you know that Clark has had a thing about your ass for years?" she asked mischievously.

She was rewarded by the incredibly rare sight of Lex Luthor blushing.

"Chloe..." he hissed in protest.

"Ask Clark why he used to enjoy playing pool with you so much," she added as she headed for the door. Pausing on the threshold, Chloe became more serious. "Look after him, Lex."

"Don't worry, I will. I think you know that, Chloe," Lex assured her.

She met his gaze for a long moment. Lex certainly sounded sincere; he looked it too. Satisfied, Chloe nodded. Then she closed the door behind her and left Lex alone with Clark.


Lex heard the door shut and immediately put Chloe out of his mind. His only concern now was Clark, his obviously inebriated best friend, who had been declaiming his appreciation of Sexy Lexy just a short while before. Clark, who had, apparently, been harbouring a fascination for Lex's ass for the past few years.

And, really, figuring out why Clark had to get very drunk to admit to that should have been lower down Lex's list of priorities than it currently was. He really ought to be trying to find out what had prompted Clark to get drunk in the first place. It wasn't like him at all. Nevertheless, Lex's mind kept coming back to the fact that Clark seemed to be having a lot of thoughts about him that revolved around his ass and sex... After that, pretty much everything else tended to be of secondary importance.

Turning back to Clark, Lex found that he was now attempting to undo his jeans. In his current state he appeared to be having a little difficulty with the zipper, though. When Clark looked up, frustration written across his face, his gaze finally landed on Lex. His expression brightened at once and he gave up on trying to unzip his jeans. Instead, he weaved somewhat erratically across the room.

"Lex!" he exclaimed happily.

Before Lex had a chance to reply he found himself being swept up in a surprisingly enthusiastic hug. Clark pulled him in close, grinning at him with drunken affection as he patted Lex's back firmly. After a moment's hesitation, Lex returned the hug, assuming that Clark would release him once he'd done so.

It didn't happen. Clark's arms remained resolutely wrapped around Lex's waist, holding him against the warm, half naked body. It was enough to make Lex's cock sit up and take notice and he took slow, deep breaths, willing his erection not to become any more noticeable. Pressed this close to Clark there was no way that he wouldn't be able to feel it and Lex didn't want to do anything to make him feel uncomfortable. Although, after what Chloe had told him, Lex wasn't so sure that would be the case.

Damn, Clark's timing really was crap, Lex thought ruefully. This simply wasn't something they should be getting into when Clark was drunk. It was a conversation that would call for a clear head on both sides.

Lex's train of thought was rudely interrupted when Clark suddenly squirmed against him, the fluid movement of his hips making it perfectly apparent that Lex wasn't the only one being affected by their proximity.

"Hey, Lex," Clark said in a quiet voice. "Chloe said I should ask you if you like me."

Lex raised his eyebrows in surprise. "Of course I like you, Clark. We're friends, aren't we?"

Clark sighed. "That's what she said too, but I didn't mean that. I want to know if you like me, Lex."

He added emphasis to the question with a quick thrust of his hips. The extra pressure on his cock made Lex groan softly.

Immediately, Clark pulled back, looking anxious. "Lex, are you okay?"

Lex stared at him, puzzled. "I'm fine, Clark. Why would you think otherwise?"

"The sound you made - I thought maybe I'd hurt you." Clark sounded unexpectedly remorseful. "I don't want to hurt you, Lex."

"You didn't, Clark." Lex rubbed his arm in a quick gesture of reassurance. "I know you wouldn't."

Clark stared down at his feet. "So do you?" he asked.

"Do I what?" Lex felt as if he were losing track of the conversation.

"Like me," Clark replied impatiently. "I like you - a lot. I have since... well, since we were in Smallville, a long time."

Clark moved closer again, his arms encircling Lex in a looser embrace this time. One hand slid down to rest on Lex's ass, the strong fingers flexing, as if Clark wanted to do more than just touch.

"I do like you, Clark," Lex began, trying not to move or do anything to encourage Clark.

Fuck, he really wished that he hadn't rediscovered his conscience because having Clark's hand there felt really good. But Lex was determined not to take advantage of Clark while he was drunk. That path was bound to lead to a whole heap of regrets come the morning and a return to sobriety. Besides, Lex still didn't know why Clark had done something as out of character as getting this inebriated.

"Mm, that's good," Clark said, sounding pleased with himself as his fingers continued to stroke Lex. "Does that mean we can have sex now?"

"Jesus, Clark!" Lex gasped. "Don't you think this is all a bit sudden? Why now?"

Clark was pouting, his lips full and red, positively begging to be kissed. "I want to, Lex. And you're here, so you must want to as well. Isn't that why you came?"

"I came because Chloe was concerned about you," Lex said gently.

"I thought you said you liked me." Clark's voice wavered and Lex despaired of resisting that and the wide, liquid eyes that fixed on him pleadingly.

"I told you that I like you, Clark," Lex repeated patiently. "I meant it, and I'm not saying that I don't want to have sex with you. I just think we should take our time and not rush into anything."

"Can we make out then?" Clark asked, looking more hopeful.

God, the boy had a one track mind, Lex thought wryly, and none of this was helping to calm his own arousal. It was amazing that his restraint had lasted this long.

"Maybe," Lex conceded, "but first I want you to tell me something."

Clark thought for a second and then nodded. "Okay," he said.

"What's all this really about?" Lex asked. "What made you want to get drunk tonight?"

Clark shrugged. "I felt like it. I just wanted to be normal."

"Normal?" Lex frowned.

"Yeah." Clark sighed. "Students get drunk, right? It's a normal thing for them to do."

Lex thought back on his own experiences. Getting drunk had been the very least of the things that he'd done in his time as a student. "I suppose it is," he agreed.

Clark nodded again, as if this was the response he'd been looking for. "Good."

It didn't really answer Lex's question, but he suspected that it was the best he was going to get out of Clark, at least for now. It also opened up a whole array of new questions, such as why Clark didn't feel as if he were normal in the first place. Lex had a few theories of his own on that subject, but this didn't feel like the right time to pursue them.

"Now can we make out?" Clark asked, pulling Lex tightly against him once more.

Without waiting for a reply, Clark bent his head and pressed his lips to Lex's. He was a little off target, only catching the corner of Lex's mouth. Clark pulled away, angled his head a little more, then moved in again. This time his lips closed fully over Lex's, the touch hot and wet as Clark's tongue slid across Lex's mouth, seeking entrance.

Lex moaned low in his throat as he got his first real taste of the mouth that had breathed life back into him on that fateful day in Smallville. There was no longer any real possibility of him resisting and he parted his lips, allowing Clark's tongue to slip between them. It carried the sharp tang of alcohol with it, but Lex didn't really care. Clark was kissing him, a little sloppy in his enthusiasm, but determined and hungry.

Clark seemed happy with Lex's surrender and his hands began tugging at Lex's shirt. With a couple of false starts he managed to untuck it from Lex's pants, sliding his hands up underneath it to explore Lex's bare skin.

With another groan, Lex reciprocated, moving to touch the warm expanse of Clark's back and the taut muscles of his chest and stomach. Clark appeared to like that too, Lex could feel the hard length of his cock pressing into his hip. Unable to resist, Lex trailed one hand down to trace the outline of it through Clark's jeans. Clark bucked against him, pushing frantically into the curve of his palm.

Pulling his mouth free, Clark buried his face in Lex's shoulder, murmuring his name brokenly. "God, Lex," he gasped finally. "I want you naked now."

His fingers quickly went to work on making that a reality. Lex felt material tear as Clark hurriedly unbuttoned his shirt, careless in his haste. That was the least of Lex's concerns, though.

"Are you sure about this, Clark?" he asked urgently as his hand found the partly undone zipper of Clark's jeans and slowly slid it the rest of the way down.

Clark undid Lex's pants with considerably less finesse.

"Lex, you worry too much," he breathed, nipping at Lex's neck as he swiftly went about stripping him. "I'm sure. I want you, just like I always did, and I'm not letting you get away from me this time."

The big hands pushed Lex's pants and boxers over his hips, letting them slip down to his ankles. While Lex untangled himself from them, kicking off his shoes and socks as well, Clark quickly stepped out of his jeans and underwear.

Glancing across at him, Lex felt his breath catch in his throat at his first sight of Clark fully naked. He was nothing short of gorgeous and Lex wasted no time in closing the space between them.

Clark caught hold of him by the shoulders, carrying out his own visual inspection. The green eyes were dark with hunger as they surveyed Lex slowly from head to toe, missing nothing.

"Mm, I always knew you were sexy," he said when he was done. "But if I'd known you looked this good..." Clark licked his lips, then pulled Lex towards him, rubbing against him enthusiastically.

Lex could feel Clark's cock sliding alongside his own, spreading pre- come across his stomach. He reached between them, curving his fingers around it. It filled his palm nicely and Lex gave it a few slow strokes. Clark moaned happily, his own hands trailing down to clasp Lex's ass, which still seemed to fascinate him.

This time it was Lex who sought out Clark's mouth. He pushed his tongue inside as he kissed Clark with considerable heat. At the same time he tightened his hand on Clark's cock, jacking it faster. Clark was moaning almost constantly, small sounds in the back of his throat. Lex let his lips slide away from Clark's, reaching up to whisper directly in his ear.

"Bed, now, Clark!"

Almost before he'd finished speaking, Lex found himself being tackled onto the bed, Clark's heavy weight on top of him. He gasped as the breath was knocked out of his lungs. Immediately, Clark rolled them over so that he was on his back with Lex draped across his chest.

"Was that what you had in mind?" Clark asked, his eyes sparkling.

Still trying to get his breath back, Lex simply nodded.

Clark spread his legs, cradling Lex between them. The position left their cocks pressed firmly against one another. When Clark rocked up into Lex they both groaned at the sensation.

Bracing himself, Lex began to thrust his hips, feeling his cock drag across the rough hair at Clark's groin. Enjoying the difference compared to his own smooth skin, Lex ground down, trying to get as much of his body in contact with Clark's as possible. Clark seemed to appreciate the contrast too, rubbing against Lex with each thrust of his own.

After a couple of tries, they found a rhythm that suited them both, moving faster as they sought completion. Clark urged Lex on, sliding his hands back down to their favourite resting place on Lex's ass.

"You feel so good, Lex," Clark moaned as he bucked against him over and over again. "Wanted you for so long, but I didn't know how to make a move. So glad I didn't wait any more."

Clark's fingers slid into the crack of Lex's ass, stroking carefully across his hole as their bodies continued to rock together. Lex squeezed his eyes shut at the added stimulation, throwing his head back and panting with effort.

"Fuck, Clark, so am I," Lex hissed as the tip of one of Clark's fingers circled the entrance, not quite pressing past the ring of muscle.

With his other hand, Clark reached up, cradling the back of Lex's head. Then he urged him down so that Lex's weight was resting fully on Clark. He seemed to like that, giving a pleased sigh as he began to thrust harder against Lex.

The added pressure on his cock was all that Lex needed. His hips jerked wildly and then he was coming hard, spilling onto Clark's stomach. His cock slid through the slick mess as he kept on moving against Clark, riding the feelings flooding his body with pleasure. Lex was still very aware of the blunt fingertip that was teasing his ass in a tacit promise of even more.

Suddenly, Clark went still under him. Looking down, Lex saw his face contort, eyes closed and lips parting in a silent gasp. Clark gave one last sharp thrust of his hips and then Lex felt wet heat on his skin as Clark came. The hands touching him tightened spasmodically for a second, just on the edge of pain, then relaxed again. Clark shuddered a few more times and Lex felt a final spurt of come spread between them.

When Clark stilled, his eyes opened slowly, looking up to meet Lex's. There was a dazed expression in them as he pulled Lex down for a long, thoroughly satisfying kiss. There didn't seem to be a corner of Lex's mouth that Clark's tongue didn't lay claim to.

Lex discovered that he rather liked this possessive side of Clark, the big, warm hands resting on his scalp and his ass showing no intention of letting go.

"Tired now," Clark muttered when he finally released Lex's mouth. "Stay."

Lex suspected that he didn't actually have a lot of choice in the matter, but he really didn't feel much like moving anyway.

"I'll stay," he agreed.

"'m glad," Clark responded sleepily. He rolled again, this time settling them so that they were curled together side by side on the narrow bed. "Night, Lex."

It didn't take either of them long to fall asleep.


Clark slowly surfaced from sleep, feeling as if he'd just woken from a dream that he couldn't quite remember. Something felt odd about his bed. It took him a second to realise that it was because he wasn't alone in it. Looking down, he saw a smooth, bald scalp and a set of very familiar features. Lex... But, how? Clearly something important had happened, but Clark's brain was positively foggy on the details. He sat up abruptly, his cheeks heating with embarrassment as he noticed that he was naked... as was Lex.

Beside him, Lex was blinking himself awake, obviously having been disturbed by Clark's movements. His lips curved into a smile as he looked up at Clark, but his expression froze at whatever he saw on Clark's face.

"I should go," he said without preamble, turning his back to Clark as he sat up, pushing at the sheets and apparently not at all bothered by his nakedness.

"Lex, wait!" Clark reached out, cautiously placing a hand on Lex's shoulder. He swallowed hard when Lex flinched at the touch. That wasn't good. "What happened?"

"You got drunk," Lex said stiffly, but he stayed where he was, as if he were waiting for something. Clark wished he knew what.

"How did you get here?" Clark definitely didn't recall having any plans to see Lex the night before.

"Chloe called me. She was - concerned," Lex replied.

Ah, that made sense, at least Clark thought it did. It still didn't address the whole nakedness issue, though. Or the fact that Lex had just spent the night in his bed. Clark really wished he could remember how that had happened.

"Did we...?" His voice wavered so Clark swallowed and tried again. "Lex, did I do anything - inappropriate last night?"

Lex's back stiffened again and Clark really wanted him to turn around so that he could see his face.

"Define inappropriate," Lex said evenly.

"Well..." Clark thought about it. "We're both naked."

"Yes."

Okay, so Lex wasn't going to give him any help here.

Clark glanced down at his stomach. His skin felt taut, as if something had dried on it. Oh...

"I feel - kind of sticky," he ventured.

"You're not the only one." Lex began to move away again. "I need a shower."

Clark tightened his grip. He wasn't going to let Lex run away from this.

"Oh God, we didn't..." Clark was coming up with a very limited number of reasons for their current situation.

"Didn't what?" Lex's voice was cold.

"Have sex," Clark blurted out.

"We're back to definitions again, Clark," Lex informed him.

"What do you mean?" Clark frowned.

God, they had; they must have. Now he couldn't remember anything about it and Lex had apparently found the whole experience so horrible that he didn't want to talk about it. Shit, this really wasn't how Clark had envisaged this eventually happening, back when they were both in Smallville. And he had always thought in terms of when it happened, not if. He'd been sure that Lex was interested in him... Oh damn, what if he'd done something weird and alien? Maybe that was why Lex wasn't talking.

"Lex, tell me what we did," he insisted.

Lex sighed. "You don't have to worry, Clark. It was just a little frottage between friends. That's all."

"Thank God!" Clark closed his eyes in relief. That explained the stickiness on his stomach too. It took him a moment to realise that Lex had finally pulled away from him and was now searching for his clothes on the floor. "Lex...?"

"I really think that I'd better leave now." Lex's voice was bleak.

"What?" Clark didn't understand... Oh, Lex must have misunderstood the reason for his relief. Clark scrambled off the bed, moving to stop Lex from dressing. "No! Lex, I didn't mean it like that. I'm glad you're here. I - I just, well, I'd like to be able to remember our first time when it happens."

Finally, Lex turned and looked directly at Clark. There was still an expression of uncertainty on his face, but it was tempered with a dawning hope. "Then - did you mean the things you said last night?"

Clark sighed, trying to get past the fog in his brain. "I'm not really sure what I said. I'm sorry. Though I do vaguely recall something about Sexy Lexy and the way Lex rhymes with sex." Clark grimaced at that, though he was glad to see the faintest glimmer of amusement in Lex's eyes at his words.

"You said that you'd wanted me since we were in Smallville," Lex said carefully. He appeared to be watching Clark for a reaction.

Clark felt his own face brighten and he smiled. "I told you that? I'm glad, because it's true. I just never found the right time to tell you before."

Lex regarded him thoughtfully for a moment, then nodded. "Good."

"It is?" Clark slid his hands up Lex's arms, letting them rest lightly on his shoulders.

"Yes," Lex replied, reaching up to touch Clark's cheek. "Because I've wanted you for just as long."

"Oh," Clark breathed, leaning into the warmth of Lex's palm against his face.

"How do you feel about making up for lost time, Clark?" Lex asked softly.

Clark drew Lex towards him. "When did you want to start?"

"How would now suit you?" Lex's fingers slid up into Clark's hair, ruffling the dark strands.

Clark let himself be pulled down into a kiss.

"It sounds perfect," he murmured against Lex's lips.


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